Christ said that even if you only lust after a man or woman, without the physical contact, you have already committed adultery with that individual in your heart. Just think how many occasions viewers of porn have dedicated adultery.
Matthew 5: 27
You have heard that it was said to those of previous, “You shall not commit adultery” But I say to you, whoever looks at a woman to lust for her, has already committed adultery with the girl in his heart.
Some may say that watching porn or lusting after a person without the physical act is completely harmless and it won’t cause anyone to cheat, I disagree, its something to be happily married and you can still appreciate the beauty of another person without lusting whether that “hot babe” neighbor of yours in Apt 7A or that Mr. “McDreamy” you encounter each day on your way to work each morning, its another thing to lust next co-worker or your spouse’s best friend etc Not to mention the fact that watching porno is disrespectful to your spouse.
The more you think about having sex with someone aside from your spouse, the more its burned into your mind and you start thinking of methods to make it a reality, the thought or picture of you, engaged in hot and large sex with this person or even those porn pictures that you hide under the bed, is burned in your subconscious and it will make you want your spouse in order to imitate what you’ve seen or you’ll try to seduce and have sex with the person you’re lusting right after.
The saying, out of the heart; the mouth speaketh is not an empty phrase.
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What if you were chatting online with someone, and you felt that you had so much in accordance with,
“Wow, my spouse isn’t going to know me as well as you do, we all just have this powerful connection” or possibly you were chatting back and forth, engaging in a lot of sexual banter trying to outdo one another about what you want to do to each other sexually and exactly how fast or slow or long you want to do it, Meanwhile your spouse is usually innocently in the bedroom watching TV totally unaware of your sexual chat going on fast and furious just ft away in the next room,
Can you truthfully say that is not cheating and that its just bravado, having fun and it will never go anywhere, we’ve both established limits, we know how far to go? Do you really?
What if you were at work and you had been talking to your co-worker, whom you’ve known for years, you’ve had the occasional “how are you? ” over the years, but now you’ve had a few conversations with each other, you’re feeling good about all the attention you’re getting and the conversation
becomes to sex and you end up posting a long, slow, wet and passionate kiss and you feel bad regarding
it; but reason, “I will not let that happen again” The spouse doesn’t have to know; it will only make things worse, what she/he doesn’t know won’t hurt her/him” Would that qualify as cheating?
You don’t have to engage in physical contact to have committed adultery and even when it really does get physical, whether a passionate hug, a “loooonger” than usual embrace or that “dirty talk” its still cheating. Physical Adultery, just like a toddler learning to walk, starts with very small steps, lust builds in to fantasy and can lead into masturbation or going out to make your lust fantasy a reality.